Avoiding and Relieving Caregiver Burnout

by Gracie Hogue

Being a caregiver can be utterly daunting. This role requires you to constantly be thinking of the other person and trying to stay one step ahead of the next need, possibility of accident, or a potential incident. Caretaking taxes a person in every respect: physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. So it is extremely important to take steps toward avoiding burnout.

Here are seven ways to relieve or avoid caregiver burnout.

1. Understand that as a main caregiver, you are the unwell loved one’s “safe person,” so you will receive most (if not all) of the unwell person’s negativity. Know that this is not your fault and that the unwell loved one may not intend to inflict hurtful words or actions towards you. Being sick, in physical pain, or mentally not themselves for the long term is a miserable experience and it is almost impossible to stay cheerful or easy to get along with during these times.  Their anger is most likely not directed towards you—it is meant to be directed at the illness; it’s just that you are the one catching the flack.
2. Set boundaries. Do not keep a full schedule aside from your caregiving duties. Learn to say no and to ask for help. Have someone pick up groceries for you or bring you a meal, or ask someone to sit with your sick loved one if you need an hour to do something that would help to refresh you. Seek support from your friends and family, and know when you need alone time. If you do not set boundaries, you cannot make time for imperative self-care.
3. Prioritize or schedule time for self-care. As commonly said, if you do not take the time to care for your own needs, your body will decide when to do that for you. This could and does happen at the most inopportune time. So schedule a short walk or quiet time, be sure that you are eating healthy foods, and stay hydrated. Get as much rest as you possibly can. Even if you’re not able to sleep well, keeping your body still for a good amount of time in bed helps it to get better rest than getting up and doing things during episodes of insomnia.
4. Breathe deeply and have times of meditation, mindfulness and / or prayer. This communicates to your body that you are not in fight or flight mode, and thus alleviates stress that can get stuck inside your body and mind.
5. If you come to the place where you are absolutely overwhelmed, seek professional help when needed. Reach out to a therapist who can guide you through the issues you’re trying to navigate as a caregiver.
6. Have an easy way to stay organized. You don’t need the extra stress of missed appointments or medications for your loved one or for yourself. Aside from a smartphone calendar or notes app, maybe keep a dry erase board in the main area of your caregiving. That way, ideas or reminders can be in plain view for both you and your loved one.
7. Again, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Think of all the times when you have been asked to help with a situation, and how you would not hesitate to do whatever would benefit a friend or family member if they needed it. You know who your trusted tribe is—they want to see you succeed and be well, and those people truly want to help you. Reach out to those people.

Caretaking is a mammoth undertaking, and thinking about your own needs can sometimes make you feel selfish or feel like it’s adding just one more thing to keep up with. But understand that if you don’t make that time, it may be worse not only for you but also for your loved one for whom you’re caring. Have grace on yourself and take things one moment at a time.