Should You Consider Hospice Care for Your Loved One?
by Olivia Wann
Caring for aged parents can present a number of challenges including juggling tasks amid time constraints and the heavy emotional toll of someone approaches the end of their journey. This is particularly challenging when one’s parents live far away. The number one goal is that the aged parent is taken care of, and their needs are fully met. Should you consider assisted living, nursing home care or hospice care for your loved one? Just what is the difference?
Assisted Living
Assisted living is designed for individuals who need assistance with daily living activities such as preparing meals, housekeeping, and shopping. This option also includes personal care services such assistance with bathing and dressing. Although the fee may seem astronomical to some, it’s more costly to secure personal assistance in the home particularly in securing dependable, honest workers.
I see this as an opportunity to thrive especially after having worked with clients who were not getting adequate nutrition or receiving much social interaction. Balanced meals are prepared and the individual can eat in their studio apartment if they want privacy or dine in the main dining hall.
Long Term Care
Long term care is not merely an option. The individual must have a chronic illness or medical condition that requires long-term care. To determine if the person qualifies for long term care, a functional assessment is conducted.
Hospice Care
Hospice care is palliative care designed for those who are living with a terminal illness. The goal is to relieve symptoms of pain and suffering for those who are dying. It’s a way of preserving dignity and quality of life while living at home, not pursuing curative care.
If I asked my senior clients if they would prefer to live at home or in a facility or apartment, most would respond that they want to stay at home. Hospice care is focused on the person instead of trying to cure the disease with the acceptance of death. Medicare pays for hospice care, unlike long term care once the maximum of 100 days is exceeded.
I’ve also asked clients, what is more frightening, to die or go to a nursing home? Most respond they rather just die. Of course, it’s not merely a matter of choice of whether to go into long term care or elect hospice care. Unlike a nursing home where 24-hour a day care is provided, hospice care involves clinical personnel visiting the home only a few times a week. This means that the family becomes the full-time care givers. My mother was in hospice care due to brain cancer. The hospice workers were simply amazing. However, caring for my mother day to day was our responsibility. Our tasks included dispensing medication, hygiene, and toileting. We were subjected to watching her decline hour by hour, day by day and yet I count it a blessing to have been with her when she took her final breath. She was given the gift to stay at home, with her hospital bed positioned at the living room window where she could see her roses and hear the birds sing.
I served a family some time ago whose father was suffering from terminal cancer. He reminded me of my mother, only in his 60’s. His choice was hospice and his sons were distressed, wanting him to pursue curative care. I encouraged them to honor his decision and emphasized that the greatest gift they could give him would be to let him die at home. How could they accomplish this with each of them working? I encouraged them to take turns and discuss the need to take family leave with their employer. Each of the sons took turns and honored their beloved father’s wishes. I firmly believe that this aids a person’s grief, knowing that we put our own needs and desires aside to honor a parent’s wishes.
In summary, be sure to discuss your medical preferences and end of life decision-making with your family. Ensure you have the right legal documents in place to avoid court intervention, such a valid power of attorney, health care power of attorney, living will, HIPAA authorization, and a last will and testament or trust. Life is a journey and may the final chapters preserve the quality of life we all deserve and want.
